Pop quiz, hotshot: when you hear the line "Pop quiz, hotshot" do you think:

a. Wow, Guardian articles are taking interactivity to a whole new level

b. Oh God, I'm having that dream again where I'm in an American high school and totally unprepared for my exam

c. Hey, it's Dennis Hopper in Speed!

If you answered "c" I can safely assume that you are one of us: people who quote from movies and TV all the time in random bouts of conversation. And I mean all the time. Yes, I know folks have always recited famous lines and many have become part of our lexicon: "Do you feel lucky?", "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn", etc. But now it's gone to the next level. We have created the universal language of quoting which is, I fear, beginning to usurp its predecessor – otherwise known as proper English. Well, it is in my head, anyway. Uh … did you just say "head"? Uh-huh-huh-huh-huh.

Dammit Beavis, shut up, I was saying something. Which is: after a lifetime of saturation-exposure to pop culture, soaking through our brains like solvents through sodden cotton wool, we have at our mental command a quote to fit every situation. And we draw on it constantly and frequently, sometimes without even thinking. Quotes accentuate our dialogue: they make it funnier, richer, deeper and more engaging. Of course, they also make it rather childish and trivial, but we won't let that bother us.

I ain't got time to bleed. I say we nuke the planet from orbit, it's the only way to be sure. The owls are not what they seem. This is your fucking wake-up call, man, I am an FBI agent …

There is absolutely nothing to beat the exact right line from a movie or TV show – whatever suits that precise moment best. Something goes well and you hiss "Exxxcelleeent" like Mr Burns, and everyone laughs along. Recently my dad stood as godfather for my brother's baby: cue lines about kissing the hand of the "padrino", may your first-born child be a masculine one, you've never invited me over for coffee. And so on and so on.

For maximum effect they're best said in the correct voice and accent of the relevant actor, but it's not strictly necessary. Either way, quotes comprise an endless, ever-giving cultural and conversational well.

Me and my friends could have entire dialogues consisting of nothing but apposite quotes. And the thing is, it will still make sense as a proper conversation. These aren't just random lines blurted into the ether between us; the best one is identified and selected, completely fit for purpose, in a millisecond, by some super-computer of the mind.

Indeed, sometimes you don't even need a quote but just the suggestion of one. The other day I was chatting to someone on the phone and threw in a line which sounded like something from Predator, but wasn't – I had got the line wrong. But he was so in tune with the "language" of action movies that he replied back with a Predator quote; he still got the reference and replied to it.

And I find it interesting that quoting isn't recognised as being a large part of the modern demotic. I once got a reply from a literary agent, who'd read a novel I had written, in which she said the dialogue wasn't believable because the (Irish) characters at times spoke like they were in an American movie.

But that was the whole point. The dialogue was real, because that's how those people would speak: in between their formal and informal language, their local slang and Irish idioms, their Hiberno-English and Queen's English, would be a flood of quotes from (mainly) US movies and TV shows.

So pop quiz, hotshots: when did you last use a quote in conversation, and what were the circumstances? Oh, and thank you, please come again.